Card reading for 10/15/19. This message came through my meditation very strong today, 'you are worthy, you are forgiven.' Do you believe in second chances? I do. At least I do for everyone else. When it comes to me, though, I admit I question it. I think one of the hardest things to work with as an empath is the feeling of carrying the world on your shoulders, a LOT guilt, and a really hard time offering yourself the same gentleness you can so easily offer others. The last few years, I have prayed for another chance at my life. I've prayed for new love, I've prayed for my children to be happy, healthy, and successful in our modern family, and I've prayed to be able to continue to do the work I love to do. But I have also made so many mistakes...and I've questioned my deservingness of such things. Along this journey I've discovered how deep my pain goes. I've discovered that reading all the spiritual books in the world doesn't mean anything until you apply it to your real life situations. Truth is, my wounds have been triggered hard these last few years and I've lashed out. It's not pretty and I know I've hurt people. I immediately feel terrible. I've prayed for forgiveness, and yet, the guilt keeps me down and I haven't felt it. The circumstances of my life seemed to go from bad to worse and I just assumed it's because that's what I deserve. But a little over year ago, I fell in love. And piece by piece, my life is looking more and more like I want it to. I've been waking up lately with immense gratitude in my heart and the inkling that things are only going to keep getting better. In my meditation today I thought ‘why not?’ and then i felt forgiveness from somewhere. Was it finally just my own self? I don't know but my heart let go and I cried because I trusted it. I really felt it. The cards today are affirming it too. The message here for you today is that you can have and do whatever you wish, but to see it as real and not a trick, you must first believe in your heart that you are worthy. Forgiveness is a neverending process for us humans and yet a multifaceted jewel. Never stop practicing it and when good things come into your world, know it is because you too are forgivable and worthy.
Namaste ❤
